Did you know you should "Expect More"?

Our story Compelled KDKA to make us part of their "Expect More" commercial series.
You can view it right here...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O7ys0FVJZDo

Debbie Vick, Jaime's mom remembering "The Bus Ride"

After I write a new chapter in the pages area you see above here, I like to add something out here about what was written.  Last week I got a touching e mail from Jaime and Jodie's mom Debbie Vick.  It helps detail how her daughter felt the night of the Franklin match.  

Hi Tim:

Reading your latest post last night brought back a flood of memories and tears.  My first thought was back to the night after the game that Ellen got the news.  Dave was in Chicago and I was sitting watching television.  Usually when Jaime came home after a game we always sat and talked about the game and her day.  That night she walked in, sat down next to me and told me what Ellens diagnosis was.  Then she lost it.  After we both held each other and cried..she looked at me and I will never forget what she said to me....Ellen is going to be fine.  She has a long road ahead but I am going to be there for her every step of the way!  She is too good a person.  I NEED her to get through this.  We then discussed what she felt she needed to do.  Jodie stated it so well...she was just so matter of fact...nothing was going to stop her. 

Tim, you GOT Jaime.  Reading about your ride back in the car... Jaime also shared that with me.  She truly loved being a part of your volleyball world and I am so glad you have many good memories of her.  Thank you Tim for sharing and being a part of Jaime's life and our family's life.

Love you,

Debbie 

         Thank you Deb for allowing me to share this personal account.   Your strength is amazing and
         knowing these things about how Jaime felt helps me believe.
         

This is getting so difficult

      I know that writing these stories has a dual purpose.  One is to detail this courageous story one last time, making sure we have it here, so we can remember.  The other is more selfish.  I need to get this out of me, before the memories fade.  There is a cost however as I get closer and closer to the parts of this story I hate the most.
      Keep in mind this is an emotional journey we have been on.  I have LOVED the people in this story, all of them.  Obviously Ellen, but Jaime, Dan, Jodie, Maggie, Dave and Deb, and Mark and the players and their families who have been so supportive of us as we continue.  I ask for your prayers as I take this story forward, to places I find hard to go.  I promise to be accurate and honest about how I have felt on the darkest days of my fifty plus years.
      Some of it will be harsh, some of it will be sad, but some of it should serve to inspire you in some way.  I have been blessed to be surrounded by the love and support of our community, and people I have never met, thousands of miles from here.  I guess that is the hopeful side to this incredible story.  Thank you all so very much!
With love,
Tim
     

Jaime's Gift

      One of the things I always found so interesting about Jaime Moran was this gift she had.  I like to watch people, so on many occasions I got to watch it play out.  Jaime could steal a room just by walking into it.  It was fun to watch others as they discovered her.  She turned heads everywhere she went.  At restaurants, in gyms, at church, and just walking down the street.  You might say well yes, she was very, very pretty and I wouldn't doubt it was a factor, but there was far more to it than outward beauty.
      First of all, Jaime never simply walked, she kind of floated in this effortless, confident way.  It caught your attention not because she was trying to, but because it was so graceful and elegant.  She also possessed an aura unlike anyone I had ever met.  Instantly you knew you were in the presence of somebody special.  Kindness radiated from her and being near her felt good.  In the time I got to spend with Jaime, she never had a bad word to say about anyone, and always searched for the positive in every situation, even in the most difficult of times.
     I like to tell about our trip to York, when Jaime helped coach for Westmoreland Elite.  We got to spend a lot of time with her, and chatted for hours about many things.  Jaime had come all the way back.  She was in the best shape of her life, having completed the entire P90X training videos.  She was so obviously in love.
When the weekend was complete we had a long ride home.  Breaking up the long ride, we started listening to some of the comedy CD's I had packed.  Jim Gaffigan had her laughing so hard that it made us laugh even harder.  Then I had this moment, this rush of realization that this was special.  In the back seat our lovely friend Jaime laughed so easily, so freely, and in the seat in front of her, I cried joyful tears, laughing through them.  Jaime Moran was in a special place, and I just felt so damned privileged to share it that day.
So this unlikely carload continued west on the turnpike.  Ellen in the drivers seat, as always, getting us safely home.  Me riding shotgun, smiling and wiping away tears.  Jaime in the backseat, enjoying the ride as few of us will ever know.

It wasn't just the season that was magical, it was the people.

If you just read my last chapter, "Coaching Plum, wearing purple?" you probably think the best part of our first year at Plum had to be winning that state championship.  Whelp, not even close...
You see, the best part, was meeting an extraordinary family, not knowing that their strength would be the lesson we were there to learn. 
The McDowell's.  Gretchen, single mother of three.  One in college, two in high school.  This set up would stress any couple plenty, but she was doing it alone!  We never pried or ask, we could just sense that Mr. McDowell's passing had happened recently.  It wasn't talked about, and so we respectfully stayed away from the subject.
  David, the oldest.  We met Dave when he came home from college at William and Mary, where he was a standout wide receiver.  I sensed we needed to win Dave over.  He was suspicious of our friendship with his family.  Under the circumstances, we totally understood.  Dave was thrust into the man of the house role, and now he was away from that home.  It couldn't have been easy for him.
Jenny, the young girl I described in the last chapter as angry and alone.  There was a storm brewing it her.  She had taken whatever had happened to her father the worst, and she wasn't afraid to show it.  But like most people, inside that tough outer shell she put on was a hurt kid who needed a push in the right direction.
Ellen and I were determined to help with that shove!
Amy, the youngest.  Amy always felt like a little sister to me, maybe because she reminded me of my own little sister also named Amy.  She was quick to laugh and funny to be around.  Whatever happened affected her the least, she was just too young to take it all in. 
The McDowell's.  A walking, talking, lesson in grace, faith and courage, mostly because the woman in charge who taught us lessons we didn't even know we were getting, ones that looking back, were no coincidence.
On many nights, driving home from a visit to their home on Tahoe St. Ellen and I would say to each other how much better we always felt after spending time with Gretchie, Jenny and Amy.  There was something very powerful, very good about Gretchen McDowell, her influence on her three children, and the idea that we happened into their lives at this point.  Just another wonderful case of being in the intersection at just the right time.,,
Gretchen passed away a few years ago, and though I miss her very much, most times I know the kind of things she'd say, and I can tell you with great certainty that she is still helping us today.

With all my love to you, David, Jenny, and Amy! 

Forward. Collisions and Traffic

I believe life consists of millions of busy intersections.  Sometimes we get safely through them, and sometimes we collide.  These Collisions can be good or bad, and can vary in intensity from minor to life altering.  They will happen.  Everyday, all day.  Some of them alter your planned route, sending you into another potential collision.  When I look back upon the road taken, it amazes me.  So many wonderful people, so many great, inspiring, and sometimes sad stories to tell.  Yet I am compelled to tell this story, recount this journey, once and for all. 
Some people refer to this as God's will.  I'd like to think He created the traffic down here, and He delights in watching his creation, watch US trying boldly to get from place to place without running in to one and other, knowing we WILL collide. 
In effort to thank Him for the collisions in my life, I will recount them here.